15/09/1973 Divided
We Stand
Jamie Farr
(Klinger)
Brought on
by Frank and Margaret's negative reports, General Clayton assigns a psychiatrist, Captain Hildebrand, to examine the 4077th
M*A*S*H unit, to see if it should be disbanded. Henry tells them to be on their best behavior, or else they will be split
up. But the 4077th soon begins to act in their traditional, insane ways: the shrink experiences Max Klinger, watches the hijinks
of Hawkeye and Trapper John, and witnesses the trysts of Frank and Hot Lips. While Hildebrand confronts the unit on its behaviour,
choppers bearing wounded begin to arrive and everyone heads for the OR. The onslaught of casualties shows the 4077th's true
side.
22/09/1973 5 O'Clock Charlie
William Christopher
(Mulcahy)
An inept
North Korean pilot, known as "5 O'Clock Charlie", makes his daily attempt to bomb
the ammo dump. Frank puts in a request for an anti-aircraft gun, which is granted when Charlie hits General Clayton's jeep.
Frank takes charge of the gun, while Hawkeye and Trapper are determined to prevent him using it, by getting rid of the ammo
dump. Frank misses Charlie and destroys the dump.
29/09/1973 Radar's
Report
Allan Arbus
(Sidney Freedman) William Christopher (Mulcahy) Jamie Farr (Klinger)
Radar writes
the weekly activity report. Hawkeye operates on a wounded prisoner who grabs a scalpel and attacks the doctors. Frank wants
Klinger thrown out on a section 8,so Henry calls in a psychiatrist, Major Freedman. Hawkeye is attracted to a new nurse but
thinks she is married. Trapper loses a patient who developed complications during the O.R. fracas with the wounded soldier.
06/10/1973 For
the Good of the Outfit
Hawkeye and
Trapper want the army to admit responsibility for the accidental bombing of a local village. They fill out a report and Major
Stoner arrives to investigate, and leaves with all the evidence. When the story is released it claims that the enemy bombed
the village, and the army tries to gag the doctors. But, thinking there could be a medal in it for him, Frank has also put
a report together, with copies of all the evidence, including shell fragments, so the army comes clean.
13/10/1973 Dr.
Pierce and Mr. Hyde
Hawkeye has
been in non-stop surgery for 3 straight days without sleep, and the wounded keep coming. He decides to find out who started
the war, and sends a telegram to Harry S Trueman. After listening to some of Frank's rubbish about the North Koreans wanting
better plumbing, he tries to send the officers' latrine to the North Koreans with an offer of peace. Trapper finally manages
to sedate him.
20/10/1973 Kim
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
Hawkeye operates
on a 5-year old Korean boy, and Radar can't find his family. Henry plans to send him to the orphanage, and the camp enjoys
his company while they can. Trapper decides to adopt him after consulting his wife, and has to rescue him after he wanders
into the minefield. Kim's mother turns up at the orphanage looking for him.
L.I.P.
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
Corporal
Walker is being sent home, and he wants to marry his Korean girl so she and their baby can return with him. CID sends Lt Willis
to investigate, but when he refuses Hawkeye and Trapper frame him. Hawkeye is upset that a nurse he was pursuing does not
approve of the marriage between "a gook" and "one of us".
03/11/1973 The
Trial of Henry Blake
Jamie Farr
(Klinger)
Majors Houlihan
and Burns challenge Colonel Blake's fitness to command, and put Hawkeye and trapper under arrest so that they can't help him.
Fortunately for Henry, they escape, and with the aid of Meg Cratty come to the rescue.
10/11/1973 Dear
Dad... Three
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
Once more
Hawkeye writes home to his father: the doctors operate on a soldier with a grenade shot into his body; Hawkeye and Trapper
colour the skin of a racist patient, who demanded the right colour blood, while he is asleep; Henry gets a movie of his daughters
birthday from home; the officers hold the monthly staff meeting.
17/11/1973 The
Sniper
A lone sniper
has the 4077th pinned down - including Radar and Henry in the shower. The poor boy thinks he's firing on McArthur's headquarters,
and a chopper finally comes by and wounds him with gunfire from above, ending the siege. Hawkeye walks out to into the bush
to tend to the wounded soldier.
24/11/1973 Carry
On Hawkeye
William Christopher
(Mulcahy)
The camp
succumbs to the Asian flu, except for Hawkeye and Margaret, who have to do everything themselves. Then Margaret catches it.
As the others start to recover, Hawkeye falls ill but is thanked with a commemorative roll of toilet paper.
01/12/1973 The
Incubator
Hawkeye and
Trapper recover from an all night party. Henry gets a barbecue, and Hawkeye puts in a request for an incubator. The Quartermaster
turns him down. They locate a Major with 3 incubators, but he won't let them have one. A Colonel tries to sell them one, and
then they get into trouble with a General at a press conference. Finally, Radar trades the barbecue for an incubator.
Hotlips does
not appear in this episode
08/12/1973 Deal
Me Out
Allan Arbus
(Sidney Freedman) Jamie Farr (Klinger)
Sidney Freedman
comes to the camp, and joins in the poker game at The Swamp. Radar hits a local with a jeep, although the local is famous
for jumping in front of vehicles for the compensation. Hawkeye and Trapper operate on an intelligence officer against regulations.
Sidney helps talk around a soldier who wants to kill Frank.
Hotlips does
not appear in this episode
15/12/1973 Hot
Lips and Empty Arms
Margaret
revaluates her life, and decides to leave Frank and ask for a transfer, which is granted. She gets drunk at her goodbye party,
but is sobered up in the shower when wounded start arriving. She changes her mind when she realises how loyal her friends
are.
22/12/1973 Officers
Only
Jamie Farr
(Klinger)
Hawkeye and
Trapper operate on General Mitchell's son, and the General gives them 3 days in Tokyo
and an officers club for the camp. They plot to allow the enlisted men access to the club, and when the General opens it the
rules are bent to give his son access, which Hawkeye exploits to give access to all. Klinger pretends to be pregnant.
05/01/1974 Henry
in Love
Henry returns
from a week in Tokyo, to announce that he is in love with a 20-year old girl called
Nancy Sue Parker. She arrives for the weekend, and Henry shows her off. Nancy
comes on to Hawkeye while Henry is in surgery. Henry is reminded of his wife back home when Radar places a call for him, and
he realises it's his wife he loves.
12/01/1974 For
Want of a Boot
Jamie Farr
(Klinger)
A riotous
episode in which Hawkeye will do anything to get a new pair of boots: In order to get Zale to get him some, he must get an
appointment for Zale with Futterman, the camp dentist, who will only do it if Henry will give him a pass to Tokyo, and Henry
will only grant the pass if Houlihan will get off his back, which she will do only if the guys throw a party for Frank's birthday,
with a cake, and Radar will only help get the cake if he gets a date with Nurse Murphy, who will only date someone with a
hair dryer, and Klinger won't give up the hair dryer unless he gets a section 8 (and Frank won't sign). Inevitably, the deal
falls through, much to the Hawkeye's chagrin.
19/01/1974 Operation
Noselift
William Christopher
(Mulcahy)
Private Baker,
who is always going AWOL, is desperate for plastic surgery on his nose. Hawkeye gets an old friend, and plastic surgeon, to
visit the camp, promising him a nurse called "The Barracuda". They put together an elaborate scheme to perform the operation
without Frank or Margaret finding out.
26/01/1974 The
Chosen People
William Christopher
(Mulcahy)
A Korean
family set up camp in the middle of the compound. A Korean woman with a baby comes looking for the father, and names Radar.
Civilian affairs relocates the family and blood tests prove Radar is not the father.
Hotlips does
not appear in this episode.
02/02/1974 As
You Were
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
While there
are no casualties, Hawkeye & Trapper crate up Frank while he sleeps and receive gorilla suits through the mail. Henry
gets a tan and gives another sex orientation lecture. When the wounded start pouring in again, their own side shells the camp,
hitting the generator, and Radar tries to get through to someone to stop the shelling.
While Frank is under anesthesia, he hallucinates and calls Hawkeye "Fred".
09/02/1974 Crisis
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
The supply
lines to the camp are cut. Radar, the housing officer, starts doubling people up to save fuel and Klinger is thrown out of
the nurse's tent. People start burning everything to stay warm while Frank wears his heated socks. The toilet paper supply
is worst hit, and then wounded start arriving. Supplies are eventually restored.
16/02/1974 George
William Christopher
(Mulcahy)
Burns tries
to slap a dishonorable discharge on a decorated soldier who admits to being a homosexual, Private Weston.
23/02/1974 Mail
Call
Jamie Farr
(Klinger) William Christopher (Mulcahy)
The arrival
of a new batch of mail leaves Trapper depressed, and thinking of desertion, despite Hawkeye's efforts to dissuade him. Meanwhile,
Hawkeye learns that he has successfully tricked Frank into buying stocks in a fictitious company, Pioneer Aviation.
02/03/1974 A
Smattering of Intelligence
Edward Winter
(Lt.Colonel Flagg)
A classic
episode in which Colonel Flagg and another secret agent from another intelligence agency come to the 4077th to keep their
eyes on one another and the camp. Hawkeye and Trapper trick them both into thinking that Burns is a traitor - one thinks he's
a fascist, the other thinks he's a communist. Vinny Pratt, a friend of Trapper's turns up.
